[acid-jazz] Dr boots on a bike, inna Vienna town

From: Velanche Stewart (vstewart@calpoly.edu)
Date: Wed Jul 24 2002 - 10:15:17 CEST

  • Next message: Velanche Stewart: "[acid-jazz] Dr boots on a bike, inna Vienna town"

    Newsflash! Newsflash! Newsflash! 'Baby, baby, baby' is finished. It's
    official! Some 'tings' will be worth the wait!

    Anyway, nuff wit da cryptic messages, on with what happened inna Vienna
    town
    this week
    And so many bunnies around we might have to invest in a rabbit hutch for
    Bootsville! This according to DJ Nippon Nik who has taking to
    reprocessing
    Plutonium as it is a lot less hassle then his present girlie! Me and Nik
    pick the loons! Check the next story folks
    The city bike!
    Yes Vienna has introduced a city bike. Deemed the Viennabike and for a
    small
    deposit of 2 Euro's this bike can be hired and ridden around the
    wonderful
    city of Wien. This actually not the first time the city bike has been
    introduced. 2000 bikes made a brief appearance back in May before
    finding
    themselves in countries such as Russia, Poland, Bosnia and Hungary. A
    few
    apparently made their way to the bottom of the river Danube too. What's
    2
    Euros anyway! BTW, If anybody does see a pink or blue Nokia/T-Mobile
    Viennabike anywhere else apart from Vienna, can we please have it back!
    We miss them. Anyway another 1500 bikes made an appearance last week and
    Dr Boots decided to take one of these bikes out for test ride.
    Here's his report!

    Bootsman and a good guy of Vienna Mr Vale Hackl decided to embark on a
    two
    wheeled excursion of the city of Wien. Well actually we were just going
    home
    after a tasty BBQ in the 19th district. Vale goes for the pink (Ooops,
    can I
    say that?) while the good Dr finds himself a stunning and very shiny
    Blue
    sponsored Nokia two wheel dream machine. This bike comes fully loaded
    with
    shopping basket at the front for all those pit stops at the local Billa
    supermarket, three speed grip shift Shimano stylee gearing for awesome
    acceleration and breathtaking top speeds, dynamo lighting for those late
    night visits to your local Herbalist. It also comes with a rear luggage
    rack
    to help give your friends a lift home. Top spec then!
    It also weighs in at a stunning 17 kilos which is not so bad as Lance
    Armstrong's 'Tour de France' bike probably weighs about 8 kilos in
    total.
    Mind you the Viennabike frame is made of lead piping instead of the
    Carbon
    Fibre frame of the defending Frog touring champion.

    If you check the
    link http://www.wien.gv.at/english/topical-journal/014.htm you will read
    that there are instructions for use of the bikes in English located at
    the
    terminals and stands. Yeah right, most English speakers need
    instructions on
    riding a bike. What next? "Place your hands on the long silver sausage
    thing
    in front of you" and "put the bottom of your foot of the black rubbery
    thing
    near the concrete and press". BTW, the guy in the Austrian hotpants in
    the
    photo isn't Cukipapa, Dr Boots or Alan Brown and has no connection at
    all
    with any of my gigs! I don't DJ at those kinda parties! I would like to
    add
    in defence of all my Viennese friends and peeps, that this is not the
    normal
    dress code in town either. We reckon the guy is a German tourist on his
    way
    to a fancy dress party! Evisu are yet to make Chamois leather pants we
    think!

    Anyway less of the idle chit chat and more of the adventure! After
    making
    sure Vale gets his bike and boots home for his nights Zzzzzzzzzzz's, Dr
    Boots rides into the distance of a warm summery Vienna Night. On my
    arriving
    at Gumpendorferstrasse station I am approached by two pink T-Mobile
    sponsered Viennabikes and two lost looking lovelies obviously enjoying
    the
    shape of the saddle (how did you know bunnies would be involved). They
    say
    in the slowest and clearest possible English "Do...........
    you...........
    know........ where..... the....... Renaissance.........
    hotel...........is?"
    I reply in my quickest and unclearest English "Do you know where your
    belly
    button is"? A deal is struck, I'll show them where the Renaissance hotel
    is
    and they both show me their belly buttons. I don't half pick em'. Two
    American girls all the way from Alabama on a vacation to the coffee
    capitol
    of world. Frightening! They decide that I am to be their 2am tour guide
    and
    that I should show them the sights of old Vienna town. I understand now
    why
    the Viennese city transport have issued English instructions on how to
    use a
    bike! Bunny number 1 had her seat about 20cms too high while bunny
    number 2
    had been peddling around in one gear all day (the hardest one). I told
    her
    that this was state of the art cycling and that grip shift gearing was
    cool
    and that Lance Armstrong would be proud of this awesome two wheeler. She
    replied that "Isn't that the guy who went to the moon". I tell her
    "no, you're getting confused with the guy with the balloon cheeks and a
    trumpet"! She nods in agreement "Oh OK then"! As we are cycling around
    the
    city, bunny number 2 asks why I always ride behind them. I reply with
    "just
    making sure everything is in working order". They think this is sweet
    and
    tell me I am the best tour guide they ever had. Bunny number 2 inquires
    how
    I know where the Renaissance hotel is! (she's very inquisitive) She
    knows
    it is not in the heart of the city and even though she has problems with
    her
    seat position she knows too that Vienna is bigger then just a fancy
    cathedral, some Spanish horses and chocolate cake or two. I tell her I
    can
    see the hotel from my apartment (which I can) she thinks that this is
    really
    cool as she might be able to see my apartment from her hotel! From this
    moment bunny number two is known as 'Bright Spark'. The adventure then
    takes
    a new twist as we then seek to see if this really could happen. Back to
    the
    15th district to test the theory that if I can see you, you can probably
    see
    me! And would you Adam and Eve it (believe it) I can spot Alabama bunny
    number 2 'Miss Bright Spark' waving as if there is no tomorrow. Bunny
    number
    1 (still no name) thinks this is the coolest thing that could possible
    happen to anyone and decides to shout through the window at the top of
    her
    voice and at 3.30am in the morning to her Alabama bunny friend who is
    several hundred metres away. From this moment on, bunny number 1 is
    affectionately known as 'Fog horn'. 'Bright Spark' and 'Fog Horn' are
    currently on tour and you can catch them at stop offs in Budapest,
    Prague
    and Bratislava. They shouldn't be too hard to spot!
    Maybe it was the 3 glasses of top notch Austrian red wine at the BBQ,
    (does
    this make me a drunk driver?) maybe it was just the fact that I live for
    moments like this. But once again Dr Boots continues to find love and
    life
    in just about every footstep (and peddle) he takes in Vienna.

    Sarajevo in da house! Cuki's house that is!
    Enes, Nina and Emina all staying at Boostville last weekend. Enes is a
    fella
    but Nina and Emina definitely count as Class A Bosnian bunnies! In fact
    Bosnian bunnies are the new lick with the Cuki. They take much pride in
    their appearance spending many hours in front of mirror looking their
    sharpest and dandiest and how it paid off. Wow! We luv ya Bosnian boots!

    Finally happy B's to Dr R, Jurgen D and Sugar B. We luv ya boots also!
    As always, it's either Schiebo or Natalie who come through with this
    weeks
    worthwhile web visit check http://www.petermc.de.vu/ on how to become
    a
    pro MC! Thanks to Natalie for this corker.

    Dr Boots prescribes the following for your forthcoming aural pleasure.
    *Nu Bitz to chart this week

    Ooops! They all went missing!
    I promise to inform all Cuki subscribers on my return from London and
    Gothenburg about some great new music!
    And if I ever get through this vinyl and CD mountain here at Bootsville,
    it
    will be one helluva chart.
    Hold tight and sorry for the tease
    Just a thought! Could this be the first Cuki chart without a
    ................. chart?
    Not even a Java Joint?
    Gotta go, gotta catch a plane
    We gone ...........

    Bussi babba
    Stay lovely
    Cuki out

    Mail to
    Alan Brown
    Soul Seduction Distribution,
    Gonzagagasse 19,
    A-1010 Vienna,
    Austria

    Mob/SMS 0043 699 1260 4000
    Tel 0043 (1) 533 76 1732, Fax 0043 (1) 533 76 18
    alan@soulseduction.com
    http://www.soulseduction.com

    Those wishing to continue mailing me in London
    c/o Reka Fabian
    75 Salusbury Road
    London NW6 6NH
    UK

    ......... and

    We luv ya boots ;)



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