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Date: Thu, 20 Jun 2002 20:04:16 +0100
From: laydee@skam.com
To: dakati@postmaster.co.uk
Subject: $kamazine #054
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the skam 054
it's got interviews and videos and music and hayfever
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aaaaaaaaiiiAAAAAAAaaaaaaahhhhhhhttttchoooooo!
ooh, 'scuse me, dakati!
sigh, summer must be here. although we can't actually see it or hear it we can feel it with the whole might of our nostrils i can tell you
jeez, i better go blow my nose, so you got off easy this time - g'wan wid ya, go watch the skam...
http://skam.com/private/WT7C57XM5M_1818099/dakati/latest.html
or go to http://skam.com and use your email address "dakati@postmaster.co.uk" and password "brim61rop"
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randomskamdom: famous for their lines... ahem!
"too many rappers give the fans what they want instead of what they need. this
hip-hop game needs an overhaul" public enemy's professor griff gets mean
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the interview: boom bip a dop dip a bop bam boo
okay, so his name is simply 'boom bip'. but it was a jazz term once upon a time before it became the name of kentucky's strangest inhabitant yet, a young man who has invented an eerie yet beautiful sound, constructed out of arrhythmic beats, feathery notes and the pitter patter of surreal verse (donated most kindly by that well known business major doseone - he got an 'A' you know!).
the skam pinnned the boom bip down and asked just how it came to be that hip hop could even imagine itself to sound like this. we also asked him about his rock star dreams, his masturbatory teenhood and his preferred choice of drugs. but then we would wouldn't we
familiarise yourself with boom bip including the full video for 'the birdcatcher's return' here :
http://skam.com/private/WT7C57XM5M_1818099/dakati/latest.html
'circle' originally came out on mush records in the states:
http://www.dirtyloop.com/
but you can buy it from these people now:
http://www.posteverything.com/
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singles: five short sneezes
new flesh - lie low - ninja tune (out 1 july)
some nasty people didn't want new flesh to succeed. ooooh, can you believe it? so new flesh get their own back on'lie low'. luckily, even if you're not interested in all that hip hop inside bitching, this is one blast of flesh air with more energy packed away inside than a duracell factory
flotation toy warning - i remember trees - pointy records (out 1 july)
so. british sea power aren't the only ones at it, then. getting all nostalgic and having water-themed names and nature-obsessed songs. a very british single, drifting through a forest near you and pretty darn gorgeous with it. blimey, it's even got opera in it
fonda 500 - computer freaks of the galaxy - truck (out now)
what on earth. this sounds like robbie williams for chrissakes! you know the one, that starts, boingy boingy boingy boingy and then he does that annoying 'talky' bit. except of course, this is nothing like. it's fun, it's squishy and stereolablike spot on
autechre - gantz graf - warp (not out for a-g-e-s...)
bloody hell. what was that? only the india-pakistan nuclear war beginning, don't you worry, my son, we're safe here in harlow. oh hang on. no it's not, it's the new autechre ep, grinding, drilling and terrifying its way through four gruesome minutes. but the dvd is what everybody will be talking about. get it n... erm was going to say 'now', but it's not out till august...
team forest - home - morr music (out now)
gently bobbing on a summery lake, this lo-fi pop gem will glint for a long while on your subconscious... and is probably the coolest 7" you'll find anywhere featuring a banjo. so there
hear them:
http://skam.com/private/WT7C57XM5M_1818099/dakati/latest.html
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how to live: specially made for dakati according to dakati's likes and dislikes and star sign
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PICK UP A COPY OF TIME OUT, CITY LIMITS OR THE LIST AND WHAT DO YOU GET, A TELEPHONE DIRECTORY THAT'S WHAT, FILLED WITH LISTING AFTER LISTING AFTER LISTING, SWIMMING BEFORE YOUR EYES THEY ARE, OKAY SO THERE ARE FEATURES AND HIGHLIGHTS TO SUPPOSEDLY HELP YOU BUT GAWD BUT BY THE TIME YOU'VE TRAWLED YOUR WAY THROUGH IT YOU CAN'T REMEMBER WHAT YOU READ AND WHETHER 'SPIDERMAN' WAS GOOD OR BAD AND... oh look. how to live is here
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EAT
shell-on prawns. dip them in garlic mayo or squeeze lemon juice on 'em. get all nice and filthy with juice running down your hands. mmm. proper outdoor picnic summer sunshine food
WATCH
the football. gah, what's wrong with you...
TAKE
pictures with the new lomo 'pop' camera. and be an instant warhol with 9 lenses taking the pic at the same time! although the skam laydee can't help having a special love for the original lomo, with it's paltry one lens and dodgy speed dial... more: http://www2.lomography.com/pop9/
DANCE
dance with the ladies in the ladies. yes why not. join the femi-9 gurlz (don't think they should spell it like that, do you?) for a night of explosive "original ruff-cut, jungalist, drum and bass and hiphop style" action in a toilet. okay it's called public life and is now a bar but it was a toilet. we-hel,they're classy like that. it's on friday 5 july in london's east end and all the info you need to know is here: http://www.symetrik.demon.co.uk/femi9/
SEE
the periphery of the british art scene. well that's what they say they'll be showing. who they? kismet durlabh singh, raj verdi and sadia ur rehman to be exact. kicking off on monday 24 june, the exhibition using painting, print and photography shows "three generations of asian artists living and working today". kismet, the exhibition's at britism, 221 westbourne park road, london (020 7243 8338)
HEAR
the chap, hairy butter, they came from the stars (i saw them) and, ooooh, the 'jarvis cocker of electro' cursor miner play at a secret warehouse venue this friday. yes, THIS friday ladies and gentlemen, 21st of june it be. there will also be beer, lights, fruity people and juicy deejaying from the likes of cherrystones (twisted nerve) and andy of stereolab... more info here: http://party.sonomu.net/
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albums: a huge rasping cough
playgroup - dj kicks - !k7 (out 1 july)
mr output (input, shake it all aboutput) mixes up one corker of an electroclash party mix, which will have you scuffing your white stilettos in no time. filthy stuff
lone pigeon - concubine rice- sketchbook/fence records (out 1 july)
he's a founding member of the beta band. which explains partly why lone pigeon's whimsical but loveable debut sounds a bit like beatles on ketamine. okay that was a bad journalist-like use of words wasn't it [not to self, must don't use drug analogies, they hurt]. i give up. you try. listen to the track on the site and sum up lone pigeon's sound in one sentence and hit reply when you're ready:
lone pigeon: _____________________________________________________________
john tejada - daydreams in cold weather - plug research (out now)
never mind an album taking you on a journey, man of the moment tejada's tech-house-break-electronica blend has got an adventure going on in every track. superb
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the skamroundup. quick, round 'em up before they run away!
****according to a survey, mtv viewers use more grooming and cosmetics products than any other viewers. now does that mean they're cleaner and prettier and have better lives then you? or just incredibly vain, completely insecure and are totally bought in by all those not very real life mtv shows where everybody looks like a model except for the token geek (who has their zits painstakingly painted on in make-up)? you decide...
****who actually goes to 'industrial' music gigs out there? the skam laydee's easily squeamish but can she be blamed for recoiling in horror at a review which described a 'eugenics council / rosemary malign' video featuring, and we quote from industrial.org: "besides the various drills and grinders which had my labourer roommate clutching his digits against his chest in phantom pain, you get the odd quarter stick of dynamite made into a make shift cannon by being tossed into an open oil drum, tear gas, you know, the usual boring stuff (yeah right). my personal fave however is the mig welder. in case you don't know what that is, a mig welder works by creating a high current electrical short, something you normally desperately avoid happening. they use a similar principle to melt aluminum - think really high current and molten metal hot. put your wet little dinky into the 220v dryer power outlet for 3 months and you will kinda get the idea... getting shit kicked by the band me!
mbers is the very least of your worries, you are lucky not to end up needing eye surgery and a blood transfusion after one of these gigs. even srl is safer since at least you are off in the bleachers and they certainly don't want to lose their corporate sponsorship. it is 100% totally fucking nuts. and about the purest form of the industrial genre you are likely to ever lose your hearing to"... sounds like a fun night out doesn't it
****no sex please we're british shocker even on big brother bloody nora. so jade and pj got it 'on' oral sex style and did anyone see anything? nope, 'cos channel 4 chiefs said 'ooh, bit too saucy that, could get the daily mail in a right frotherie'. so despite the fact that the big brother producers tried everything to get the big brother zoo creatures to indulge in a bit of crumpet for our voyeuristic delights (double beds for starters) the british are as uptight as usual... and thank god, to be honest, think the sight of that would have given me nightmares for weeks...
****whassisname robba dank? rob da tank? react, the record label who're putting out 'real ibiza V' mixed by rob da bank and phil mison couldn't make up its mind either in a mailout and got the pony-tailed chillout dj's tour dates down as rob ba dank. oh no sorry, even that's not as wrong as they got it. they called him rod ba bank! wonder if we were the only ones who noticed...
****these days when you buy a sweet you don't just eat the sweet, you look at the mad pyramid packaging, read the packet, go on the website and get free email and free webspace... go to bite-it.com if you don't believe me
****unlike the weaklings on british pop idol, the american kids are giving simon cowell a good dressing down as well, with one saying cowell could "kiss my natural-born black ass" and another saying "you're deaf". that'll teach him
****so eminem's got a death threat hanging over his head has he? it's as if no one had ever heard of the phrase pr stunt...
****crikey. drop the football, the 8th uk guitar championships have already started! a 19-date tour around the uk, they'll be "searching out the best / worst air guitarists in the land, bringing them together under one roof sometime in august to battle it out for the coveted title of air axe god 2002"... http://www.ukairguitar.com
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the skam +
+ peaches in the top 40. the lady rocks
+ buying a new gorgeous lipbalm
+ the footie. bringing the nation togeva
+ engeeeerrrland
+ camera knackered and getting a brand new one sent for free
the scum -
- peaches in the top 40. so now sony will get all gleeful and grabby about her
- buying a new gorgeous lipbalm, opening it and realising somebody's fingerprint is already in it, urgh
- the footie. 'cos you have to get up at ridiculous hours to watch it
- brazil. booo [sorry any brazil skamsters! but we're allowed just this once]
- camera knackered and not being able to take pix for three months
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interactivereactive: quite
weird email of the fortnight award is from scott williams who says:
"I like your emails
They are like jazz feathers. Only the jazz is small like a flea on a cat.
And the cat is a search engine for jazz fan made out of feathers"
blush. thanks scott. you know, no one's ever said that to the laydee before...
odd band name email of the fortnight award goes to leo more who says:
"i'm in a band and i want to send you some of our music, we're called mr burntylips"
rewind. you what? mister burntylips. oookkaaaaaayyy
he then asks if i might go to his gig...
"come on skam laydee show your face, don't be just an e-mail"
... but dear burntylips, we promise you, the skam laydee exists only here, in front of your eyes. you have all been taken in. oh, stop that smirking, even you, dakati, thought so at one time
gaylegs got back in touch and rambled some more. which we liked:
"chuffing, chuffed, it's all the same to me and my best friend chris de burgh, who makes money now that his recording career is over by loaning out his splendid haircut to the presenter of gardeners world so that he can appear as ugly as possible when working on ground force, thus allowing charlie dimmock to become the most unlikely sex symbol since michael bolton was birthed upon the world"
giada wants to know if we runed an interview. seriously, that is exactly what he says. look, this is it, word for word:
"did you ever did and rune the interview for the new Black Dog labum...?" thing is we'd love to, but you can't get the chisels these days... also, don't think black dog did a labum... am i being mean? am i, am i? it's just a typo innit. oh dear, but it did make me chuckle
and finally, a joke to finish off the final part of this end bit
from slowmo matthew ivany this time. in a tommy cooper way of speaking:
"so trains then - the conductor comes up to check my ticket and says to me
"are you first class?" and I says "yes thanks, and how are you?"
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the blurb:
the skam is a highly evolved body of entertainment which exists in its past but your future
you can unsubscribe by unchecking the 'zine' box on your private page if you like:
http://skam.com/private/WT7C57XM5M_1818099/dakati/index.html
but you'll live to regret it
the link also goes to the web-page where you can do things like change your password ("brim61rop") if you don't like the one we gave you from our automatic weird password generator AAAAAND you can add your postal address if you want nice things sent from us one day or if you want us to come and visit AAAaannd you can also change your name so that it actually says your REAL name instead of the first bit of your email address! coool, huh
here it is again:
http://skam.com/private/WT7C57XM5M_1818099/dakati/index.html
PS all the specially personalised skam links in this email are for you and you only. best not pass them on willy nilly because then others will be able to tinker with your skam option and give you a headache. sigh. ask them to get their own subscription instead, the tight bastids
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(c) the skam 2002. aaargh, here comes another one... aaaiaaaiaaittttchoooo!
This archive was generated by hypermail 2b30 : Fri Jun 21 2002 - 00:17:43 CEST